I’m Applying to Become a Spy—Will I Be Able to Get Life Insurance?

0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
or copy the link

First of all, congratulations on your career choice! How exactly do you apply to become a spy? Is there an actual application? Do you have to take one of those multiple choice amplitude-type tests?

You’ll get back to me on it? Great. Then, I’ll answer your question.

Here’s the thing, I don’t think spies read these kinds of articles terribly often, so if this is a spy job you picked up on Craigslist, you might want to look into how legitimate it is. For the sake of argument, however, I will say that yes, technically, you should be able to get life insurance as a spy.

More than likely, whomever you’re spying for would probably cover the cost of life insurance as a perk of the job—after all, you are risking your life to bring back valuable intelligence that they need. However, if you were forced to go outside of your employer to obtain life insurance, a high-risk occupation like being a spy would definitely cost you a lot of money.

After all, there’s a great deal that a life insurance company would have to take into account. More than likely, every single employee, at nearly every single life insurance company (such as Suncorp), has seen at least one James Bond flick. When you tell them that you’re a spy, chances are that’s the image that will dawn in their minds and it won’t inspire much confidence—this lack of confidence will be appropriately represented in expensive premium quotes.

BUT… BUT… I PLAN ON BEING A SUPER SPY!

Unfortunately, that’s not something that you’ll really be able to prove, and even if you could, it wouldn’t change anything. It’s the occupation itself that’s high-risk and prone to short life expectancies, so that’s what they’ll take into consideration.

Typically, life insurance companies go to the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics to determine what fatality rates are for any given occupation—though, I doubt the USBL has much on spies. Every so often, though, the bureau publishes a report with statistics on occupational fatalities and ranks their high-risk jobs accordingly. If being a spy was something that regularly produced statistics like that—ones that weren’t highly classified anyway—I’m sure they’d be high up on that list.

Another way insurance companies determine if an occupation is high-risk is simply by looking at what their own experience with a particular occupation is. If they’ve previously insured any spies, and lost money as a result, then you can be sure they’ll be reluctant to take that risk again.

WHY DOES HIGH-RISK EQUAL HIGH-PREMIUMS?

Any insurance company out there is exactly that… a company, or in other words, a business. For any business to stay in business they have to turn a profit and insurance companies have a very delicate balance that they have to adhere to. They’re taking risks on individuals all day, every day, and attempt to make educated decisions on what they charge for premiums. In order for them to pay out hundreds of thousands of dollars, or sometimes millions, at once, they have to have a steady stream coming in. If they make too many high-risk choices, the balance falls against them.

Just like with anything else, or anyone else, a life insurance company wants to make good investments for the future of their company and their continued ability to provide their service.

Rest easy, though; as I mentioned before, if you’re really going to become a spy, someone will have you covered.